[sdiy] sdiy marriage troubles?

[jvastine]

Flight has a very valid point here and offers a great suggestion. Now when you consider that your wife is pregnant, this makes the need to put her first that much more important as during a pregnancy the womans hormones and the accompanying emotions are all over the place. That is, as Flight brought out, if she truly is the most important part of your life. It seems that she is feeling like you give more of yourself to sdiy, the studio, and the music industry than to her. 

If she really is #1, make arrangements with one of her friends to take her shopping or something for a couple of hours one afternoon. Then while their out doing heir thing, clean up the apartment as best you can and prepare her favorite meal. This way when she comes home you can surprise her with something that shows that you care. Afterwards talk to her and let her know that you're sorry that she was feeling like 2nd string and honestly tell her why you've been spending so much time devoted to sdiy. 

Now I presume that this is really to help you reach your goal of getting a house or bigger place as well as providing for your growing family in the best fashion that you can. Too bad you are not in this area or I would let you have the other half of my duplex, which is 2800 sq. ft. with 3 bedrooms, 1.5 baths, livingroom, kitchen, family room, laundry area, and since the basement is half finished, there is a perfect area to set up a workshop & studio...all for only $750. Too bad there's nothing like that in your area.

I do hope that you get everything worked out soon for everyone's sake.

Good Luck!

jvastine

---- flightofharmony <flight at flightofharmony.com> wrote: 
Okay, everyone's dancing around this, but I'm going to jump to what is
probably the main issue.
" the synth is not leaving and neither is electronics."
You stated flat-out that this stuff is more important than your wife. It
sounds like she knows (or suspects) this also. 

Now comes the hard part: Which is *really* more important to you? The answer
to that is the answer to the problem.
If She is the most important to you, then sit down and talk to her about it,
reassure her and make some concessions. As long as she knows where she
stands in your eyes, things should get easier.
If She isn't, then...

~flight (I've had two divorces, so I've been there and had to learn some
hard lessons.)
flight at flightofharmony.com
http://www.flightofharmony.com


-> -----Original Message-----
-> From: synth-diy-bounces at dropmix.xs4all.nl [mailto:synth-diy-
-> bounces at dropmix.xs4all.nl] On Behalf Of Dan Snazelle
-> Sent: Saturday, October 04, 2008 7:04 PM
-> To: synth-diy at dropmix.xs4all.nl
-> Subject: [sdiy] sdiy marriage troubles?
-> 
-> 
-> 
-> can anyone give me some advice on how to deal with wives who are angry
-> about sdiy mess...we live in a small apartment so most if not all of my
sdiy work
-> goes on in the bedroom...which at this point we have divided into two
-> sections...my work area and the bedroom.
-> 
-> soon enough i hope to have an office but for now it is becoming a major
strain
-> in our relationship....but the synth is not leaving and neither is
electronics.
-> 
-> 
-> 
-> p.s. at this point we cant afford anything bigger and we dont have any
-> basement.
-> 
-> 
-> thanks
-> 
-> 
-> 
-> --------------------------------------------
-> check out various dan music at:
-> 
-> http://www.myspace.com/lossnyc
-> 
-> 
-> http://www.soundclick.com/lossnyc.htm
-> 
-> 
-> http://www.indie911.com/dan-snazelle
-> (or for techno) http://www.myspace.com/snazelle
-> 
-> _______________________________________________
-> Synth-diy mailing list
-> Synth-diy at dropmix.xs4all.nl
-> http://dropmix.xs4all.nl/mailman/listinfo/synth-diy

_______________________________________________
Synth-diy mailing list
Synth-diy at dropmix.xs4all.nl
http://dropmix.xs4all.nl/mailman/listinfo/synth-diy